After I gave birth to Blue they took him straight down to the neonatal unit meaning I missed out on seeing him, first cuddles, first pictures and first moment of cherishing him. All I could think about was if our son was alright.
I had a shower and got all my stuff ready to be moved up to the ward..now I was told I’d go onto a ward where it’s all nicu mums and no babies. Nope, I was put into a room with three tiny little babies and my heart broke. Seeing mums feed, cuddle, kiss, smile and interact with their newborns killed me, I cried the entire time I was in there. It wasn’t fair .
A couple hours later I was finally moved into the nicu room where there wasn’t a baby in site , we were all in the same boat. I could still hear babies crying so I was still breaking inside. My partner stayed with me the entire time , comforting me and trying to make it a little easier for me. My appetite went to pot as my mind was just focused on our son so I didn’t eat much.
I was given painkillers and an injection into my stomach while waiting to go down to see him , the injection absolutely killed. I had it for 10 days post birth. We decided not to tell anyone apart from close family and friends at this point so we weren’t bombarded with messages which was nice. My mum went home to get us some stuff for our hospital stay.
I got so sick of waiting to be taken to see him so at about 5:30pm I asked when we could go down. That’s when we were told at 6pm we would be able to, that half an hour felt like 6 Years if I’m honest. Then finally it was time, the moment we had hernia waiting for, longing for and seriously anxious for arrived and we went to see our son.
Keep an eye out for the next post to get an insight into the first time we saw Blue.